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Thursday, December 17, 2009
 I often wonder what someone else thinks when they see the word Cyberstalking. I certainly cannot be the only one sitting back and reading blog posts the last few months with pure disappointment in watching grown adults cyberstalking, or bullying, other people simply because they can. I woke up this morning to a plurk about a child being cyber bullied and thought really, how amazing it is to see the same type of behavior going on in an adult community like Second Life and how it has been deemed acceptable in some forms, for some people. I did a little bit of googling, reading on the Wikipedia, and am more convinced than ever that there are in fact some people within our community that very publicly cyberstalk people and are even supported for it. The question remains, why? At what point are we drifting over that line of justification to post and say whatever we want to being a harasser or stalker? A short quote that really made me think: "When identifying cyberstalking "in the field," and particularly when considering whether to report it to any kind of legal authority, the following features or combination of features can be considered to characterize a true stalking situation: malice, premeditation, repetition, distress, obsession, vendetta, no legitimate purpose, personally directed, disregarded warnings to stop, harassment, and threats." Even more interesting read a bit further down, about a cyberstalkers behavior: "Victims of cyberstalking may not even know that they are being stalked. Cyberstalkers may research individuals to feed their obsessions and curiosity. Conversely, the acts of cyberstalkers may become more intense, such as repeatedly instant messaging their targets. More commonly they will post defamatory or derogatory statements about their stalking target on web pages, message boards and in guest books ..." I think there are people who are cyberstalkers and don't even realize it. Running off and searching information about people online just to post it in an 'informative blog post' is, in the eyes of many, a form of cyberstalking. It isn't just about an obsessive ex who wont stop watching someone they want to be with still. Its also in the form of one person making very public statements about someone they really aren't involved with in order to obtain blog hits, encourage discussion about said person or even using the cover of calling it a vent. It never ceases to amaze me to find people you would otherwise think of as normal, mature adults participating in the ripping, slandering and hostile commenting about someone they in all honesty have absolutely nothing to do with. At what point will someone actually stand up and say 'No, this is wrong' and fight against this form of internet abuse? Is it an acceptable activity for certain people because they are better known, or popular in a sense, to the public? Is this what encourages people to come in and make comments thus adding to the abuse by participating themselves? Or have we hardened ourselves and forgotten the fact that there is indeed a person behind ever avatar and simply because we don't like them, approve of their choices, have an issue with their behavior or someone we know doesn't like them, does not entitle us to be cruel and harass them. Before anyone even tries, by the way, there is a very clear difference between letting the public know factual information and being outright hostile while doing so, this is where the line gets fuzzy for most. Do many of us have any idea the internal stress and anxiety that can be caused by being targeted by people in this way? Can we imagine how a person can be affected, or has human compassion and sensitivity to the well being of others been cut off once we sign on? Interestingly enough I have received a lot of feedback about cyberstalkers/bullies when I talk to people in world about it but it remains, people are actually afraid to stand up for others because they don't want to be the newest target. It sounds just like high school, doesn't it? Where does that activity of informing the public, sharing our own experiences or venting cross the line into cyberstalking and is there anyone left who is willing to speak up and say 'I think what you are doing is wrong!' Regardless of what the person may (or may not) be doing, the bandwagon has been making its rounds for months, stopping to run over a person here or there and very few have put a foot down to say, enough. I suppose when you get right down to it, we would only do that for our closest friends, those we have an emotional attachment to because, as so many put it so well, we just don't care about the other person being discussed. There are so many times, I am extremely ashamed to admit, that I have sat back and watched it in sincere pain while someone else is trashed at the enjoyment and delight of others. I've been here too long, maybe, and been harassed myself, and I internalize everything to the point of feeling what the person must be feeling upon reading the words of others. The year is fast coming to a close, 2009 is almost gone, breaking the silence and standing up for people when and where I can is going to be one of my biggest, and granted possibly the toughest, goal for 2010. Whether you think so or not, everyone matters, we all have feelings and instead of ripping someone down, you would get so much more out of life for lifting them up. Amazing to me, I am actually sitting here expecting someone to insult me or tear me down for saying much of what I have said, or intend to say in the future, but I guess this time I get to be the one that says 'I don't care....enough is enough.' Keeping with fashion, Dina's Duds: Hair (Dina & Kerra): Truth Sweater (on Dina and front model): Mischief Pants (Dina): Snatch Sweater (Kerra): Pacadi Pants (Kerra): Drawmachine Scarf (Kerra): Truth Hair (front model): Maitreya Labels: Avanista, Drawmachine, iheartsl, Maitreya, Mischief, PACADI, Snatch, Truth |
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